Pimp My Personality

Across the pond in the good ol' US of A, the MTV programme 'Pimp My Ride' is fairly popular, and why shouldn't it be? It's an interesting programme, what those people can do with a crumbling rust bucket is nothing short of brilliant and, in "X to the Z" Xzibit, it has a decent host.

And that's where the UK version fails. Instead of getting a charismatic, humorous and sensible host to present Pimp My Ride UK, MTV employed the grade A muppet that is Tim Westwood.

Those of you that like your R'n'B and Hip-Hop will know who this burke is, but for those of you who don't, Tim Westwood is the son of a vicar who hosts a Rap / Hip-hop show on BBC Radio One. He got shot in a drive-by incident in 1999 and even used to host some obscure late night music programme on ITV many moons ago, but that got cancelled before anyone knew it existed.
The problem for Westwood is that for some reason, he seems to think that he is black. Don't ask me why he thinks this, he just does.
Be it on TV or Radio, this half-wit is constantly telling us to "take it easy dawg" and "Holla!!" at every given opportunity. You could make a very strong case that Tim Westwood is the sole reason why Britain's youth is talking absolute bollocks.

As for Pimp my Ride, he's cringingly embarrassing. He's not funny, he's not charismatic and he can't talk like a rapper.

When he’s not telling some confused 19-year old how “strong” his “car game” is, he’s declaring how he “tears up the streets big style” in his stupidly big American truck.

Xzibit can get away with it, he can pull it off. A 48 year old, middle class, white man who’s pretending to be “street”, can’t get away with it.

What’s more outrageous is, because the guy works for the BBC, I’m paying to keep this tool in a job with my license fee. (In Britain, you have to pay £100+ per year to watch TV, and that pays for our impartial, advert free BBC)

The other problem is that for some peculiar reason, he seems to be popular with American rap artists. Now, I’ve nothing against rap artists, but if they can stand spending time with this half-wit, then they have probably taken one bullet to the head too many. But that gives him an even bigger ego. He thinks that as long as 50-cent seems to like him, then he must be the greatest DJ ever to grace the planet.

Funnily enough, ‘Fiddy’ (as I believe he is sometimes referred as) hasn’t offered to put him up in the States to keep him away from us Brits.