Sunday, March 05, 2006

Work Appraisals


You have to wonder sometimes if your boss has anything better to do.

Most workplaces have a policy of doing staff appraisals or reviews, but rarely bother doing them.
Last week I had my 3rd 3-monthly appraisal for just over 4 years service, so we do them more regularly than most.

The boss calls me up, gives me the usual cock-and-bull story about where the firm is going, what plans they have and what my role is in those plans (usually just to shut up and do what they tell me to do). Then he starts asking me questions suggesting he cares about my opinion although I just nod and agree because I just can’t be arsed to strike up a conversation with him. I did hold the record for the longest appraisal a few years ago (31mins) but I couldn’t care less anymore. I wanted to get out of there as quickly as possible and I think he wanted me out of there as well.
After that he starts marking my performance, out of 5, on this ‘new starters’ sheet. Only with the phase “new starter” crossed out and the phrase “one-to-one review” written on, so I knew he was taking it seriously. After a few 4’s, a couple of 5’s and a 3 (for motivation), he sends me on my way to send the next bored looking sap up to his offices. He looked like he’d run out of pointless busy work to do, so was trying to make his own and in all honesty it wouldn’t have surprised me if he just made paper aeroplanes out of the forms after he’d done.

I really didn’t see the point in the whole escapade, and I’m interested to know how productive he thought that 3 minutes was.

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